The Prayers and Thoughts Sustainability Department (PTSD) operates at the critical intersection of emotional support and practical efficiency. We maintain the world's largest repository of meticulously crafted thoughts and prayers, ensuring their availability when most needed, while allowing individuals to redirect their valuable mental and emotional resources to matters requiring their direct attention.
Mission Statement
To conserve, curate, and distribute high-quality thoughts and prayers during times of need, ensuring this essential resource remains abundant and accessible without burdening already-overwhelmed individuals with the taxing work of formulating original expressions of concern.
Vision
A world where no crisis goes unacknowledged, where thoughts and prayers flow sustainably to where they’re needed most, and where individuals can participate in collective empathy without sacrificing their limited cognitive and emotional bandwidth.
Core Service Proposition
In today’s complex world, demands for attention and empathy have reached unprecedented levels. Studies show the average person encounters 37 situations daily that warrant thoughtful acknowledgment—an unsustainable burden that threatens our collective capacity for meaningful support.
PTSD addresses this challenge by establishing a renewable infrastructure of pre-formulated, highly optimized expressions of concern. Our service ensures that thoughts and prayers—these finite natural resources—are:
Preserved – Through careful documentation and archiving
Replenished – Via our team of empathy specialists
Distributed efficiently – Using our proprietary delivery algorithms
Available at scale – From individual disappointments to global catastrophes
Our Commitment
At PTSD, we understand the demands of modern existence. You’re managing careers, relationships, personal growth, financial planning, wellness routines, and endless digital communications. The additional burden of formulating original thoughts and prayers simply isn’t sustainable.
We’re here to ensure that even as you focus on your essential priorities, your capacity to acknowledge others’ struggles remains uncompromised. Because in a world of limited resources, empathy shouldn’t be the first thing we sacrifice.
AS LONG AS THERES TRAGEDY
YOU'LL ALWAYS HAVE

Author
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Orin P. Cooper (uninsured), is an avant-garde wordsmith hailing from Oxford, MS ("the birthplace of the comma," as he insists), is best known for his unapologetically unfinished works, including *One Final Draft: Obsessive Compulsive Dangers Pertaining to the Perpetual Pursuit of Perfection* and the divisive *Metaphors Are Like Similes: A Collection of Description.* Most evenings, Orin can be found at a cozy coffee shop, furiously clacking away on a vintage typewriter that may or may not actually work, claiming his spelling errors are "intentional emotional cries for help." He currently resides with a mildly disreputable cat named Subtext, who, like his owner, rarely acknowledges the existence of others and seems to be harboring a secret. Probably porn related.
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